The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
