So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Randomize
