is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
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