im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize