so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize
