Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
