you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize