Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Randomize
