saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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