i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
