There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize
