So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
