My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
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