too bad you live with your parents still
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
