I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
