Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
only you would photoshop your dick
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
