Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
