I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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