question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
