Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
She's like a pop up book from hell.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
