Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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