I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize