they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
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