I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
