how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
