Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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