apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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