I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
