some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
