At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize