it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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