Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
