Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
