remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Randomize
