Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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