I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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