Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
where am i from again
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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