how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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