Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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