oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize