Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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