What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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