I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
