Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.

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(816): View more from Missouri

Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.

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(901): View more from Tennessee

god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.

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(507): View more from Minnesota

So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING

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(228): View more from Mississippi

Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?

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(701): View more from North Dakota

Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low

(1-973): View more from New Jersey

suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other

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