did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
