I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
