dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
he puts the penis in happiness.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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