So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
