i think i have herpe
just one?
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
