wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
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