Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
