You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
